Looking with disgust at Jonathan’s paper, the teacher snatched it, ripped it into pieces and discarded it in the garbage bin, all while running on with a verbal tirade that further humiliated Jonathan in front of his peers.

So, what is wrong with this picture?  Well, notwithstanding that this is a real situation, let’s see if there is anything right about it first……..  Got anything?  Neither did I!  One might say that the teacher perhaps had a high standard for work presentation, or that her knee-jerk erratic response was her way to show the student she thought he was capable of better.  But was that the right time or even the right response to convey such a message?  Absolutely NOT!

What Else is Wrong?

Finding out that this same teacher seldom smiles, is always critical in her comments and only offers negative feedback about the student’s work, makes the opening scenario even more disheartening.  Is compassion even in her vocabulary?  Does she have the ability to understand the emotional state of others?  Knowing how to treat students with compassion is one of those things you are not taught in education courses, yet is one of the most significant indicators of exceptional teachers.

Perhaps you have wondered why some students always congregate in a particular teacher’s classroom at recess or early in the morning, while other teachers are devoid of such cordial visits.  Maybe it’s because the teacher understands the students as complex people and make them feel that they belong.  Or possibly it’s because the teacher realizes that he/she does not have to sacrifice academic rigor for a compassionate classroom environment.  Such teachers actually believe that challenge and encouragement are two sides of the same coin.  They value their students’ voices and ideas, and push them to be the best version of themselves.

Practical Solutions

If you think you have moved away from being a compassionate teacher, here are 10 practical ways you can begin to reflect more compassion in the classroom:

1. Smile with your students. Joking around, my teenagers would say that if some of their teachers smiled, their faces might just crack.  What a shame!  A simple smile lets students know that you are glad they are a part of your class.  Country singer, Dolly Parton said, “If you see someone without a smile, give them one of yours.”  So help your colleagues if they fall into the “smile-less” category.
2. No matter what, keep your cool! We all know that teachers have a lot on their plates, and some students can really push your buttons, but this is no excuse to lash out and explode on students with unreasonable behavior and negative words.  If it happens repeatedly, perhaps such teachers may want to consider establishing a personal routine of exercise and healthy nutrition to decrease stress, relinquishing some responsibilities, taking a sabbatical, or maybe even submitting to therapy.  Do whatever it takes because the goal is to be courteous to your students at all times.
3. Celebrate with your students. This may seem to be common knowledge, but to have a student win a national competition and not be congratulated by his teacher or even the school’s administrators, is sadly some students’ reality.  Celebrating their accomplishments opens the door to a better teacher-student relationship and a more engaged student.
4. Write more positive and constructive comments on your students’ papers than negative ones. Can you imagine waiting for over a month to receive feedback on an assignment only to find the words, “You are the only one who didn’t do what I asked!”.  Hmmm, not very constructive and certainly NOT encouraging.
5. Institute a system to make it easy for students who have missed a class to get caught up. This can be as simple as having a box with extra copies of handouts or just assigning a student to fill them in on what transpired.  If, like in the opening scenario, the student missed the class for sickness, you definitely don’t want to make a big deal about missing notes.
6. Communicate positively with your students every day. I am not talking about the long lectures.  Positive communication with your students can be a silent smile, a commending head nod, a pleasing stare or even an encouraging hand on the shoulder.  But let’s not forget that communication is a two-way street.  Therefore, pay attention when your students speak to you and really listen without interrupting.
7. Invest time in encouraging your students to excel. Some students encounter many problems, but praise and encouragement are great remedies for most of their challenges.  One caveat here is to avoid giving those cliché, almost commercialized praises such as, “You have great potential!”  One student admitted that he cringed inside when his principal said the exact words to him.  In his mind, he said those were just empty words that meant nothing.  So, be specific with your praise.
8. Differentiate instruction whenever possible. This means that constantly dictating pages of notes won’t cut it.  Varying your approach lets students learn in a way that best fits their learning styles, and simultaneously demonstrates that you value them and the way they learn.  This may be a more prevalent practice in the elementary classrooms, but differentiating instruction in high school is very important.
9. Embrace each student’s individuality. Young adolescents especially are trying to come to terms with who they are and how they will present themselves to the world.  Embrace their uniqueness rather than giving in to stereotyping and judging.  When we do,
10. Create a community within the classroom. Even as a college professor, this is one of the main avenues I take in my courses.  Do some practical activities to get students comfortable with you and with their peers.  Helping students connect to each other gives them a support system that can help them navigate school life.

Implementing these ten ideas might sound like a tall order that requires much effort.  Admittedly, if compassion is not an everyday practice, these tips may seem challenging.  However, we must remember that just being a smart teacher who knows his/her content area well is not enough.

Students will never trust or even open up to hear what their teachers have to say unless they feel their teachers value and respect them.  Developing a positive relationship with them by reflecting compassion is instrumental in making this a reality.

Leave a comment:  In what ways do you show your students that you understand and care about their emotional challenges?

Desiring a change is a good thing, but sometimes the options seem so few and the possible changes seem like a giant step out of our comfort zones.  Trust me I know the exact feeling! 

Perhaps you’ve been working in that same position, teaching at the same grade level or in the same school for such a long time, that you just want something different…..ANYTHING!!!  You can feel that you are a bit stagnant and that’s not good.  The last time I checked, stagnant water begins to stink and little life hangs around it.

Recently, I’ve had conversations with several excellent educators who expressed that same inertia in their professional lives.  They still loved being an educator but sensed the need to do something else, perhaps even something more challenging.

But what options are there, especially for educators?  Well, it all depends on your desire.  If you still envision yourself in the field of education, maybe you might want to consider such adjustments as:

• Changing the scenery by moving to a different grade level that you’ve seldom or never taught before.
• Requesting a transfer to a different school or school district.
• Seeking to specialize in an area where you’ve developed additional expertise.
• Taking on the challenge of a new initiative for students after school or even during lunch time.
• Engaging colleagues in an on-campus mastermind group that devises and engages in regular professional development initiatives.
• Applying for a leadership role as a grade level leader, department head, subject coach or an administrator.
• Accepting the challenge to mentor novice teachers in the field.

These are only a few ideas that you can consider.  However, if you find that nothing excites you, you may need to reevaluate your personal career vision for your life.  In doing so, you might find that it’s time to move on.  Nothing is worse than being in a place when the fervor for it has gone.  Not only would you be miserable, but you’ll make those around you miserable too.  Furthermore, you might be experiencing burnout and this is definitely not a healthy thing.

We were designed to keep growing, to be productive and to add value to others.  To do this, we must embrace change as a good thing, and remain committed to excellence.

Leave a comment:  Have you ever experienced that “feeling” that  it was time to do something different in your career?  How did you handle it?

Instead of driving the ball into the end zone, the QB decided to throw it, and …………. ZAP!  Just like that, a rookie defense player intercepted the ball and made the game-changing play that gave his team the championship title.

Isn’t that just like life, sometimes?  It appears as if things are going so well and nothing could go wrong, then out of the blue, the decision you make goes awry.  If this hasn’t happened to you, then just keep living.

Perhaps you’ll make a decision to incorporate PowerPoint slides in your lesson but have the LCD projector to go bad.  Maybe, you’ll decide to offer your students extra help only to find that the parents wouldn’t allow them to attend.  Or you might decide to surprise your spouse with a lunch date but learn that he/she is too busy to leave work.

Whatever it may be, sometimes our decisions may not yield the intended outcome.  But that’s okay.  Stuff happens!  The important thing is how we respond to the experience.  We’ve got to take the good with the bad but keep learning so that the good begins to outweigh the bad.

Sometimes when we make a strategic call that fails, we tend to shy away from being decisive the next time around.  But making decisions is a part of moving forward in any arena.  Winners, like the recent super bowl champions can give us a few tips about making the call.

1. Do it even if you’re scared. Are you waiting for the right emotions to cue the decision you should make?  Well, you’ll be waiting until you’re blue in the face and those butterflies will still be jumping in your belly.  Many times, those decisions will have to be made in the midst of fear.
2. Figure out your ideal time for decision making. Though fear tends to raise its ugly head, would you believe that the time of day could help you make better decisions?  Apparently, the morning time is better for making those tough choices that involve high risk.  As explained in this video, it all has to do with the level of serotonin in our brains.  Interesting, huh?
3. Don’t just choose the default option. When there are several options to consider some folks prefer to go with what others have already selected.  They don’t want the stress of thinking it through.

Grantland Rice noted, “a wise man makes his own decisions, an ignorant man follows public opinion.” So, instead of abdicating responsibility for properly evaluating, we should first limit our options.  No doubt, the quarter back looked at the various plays he could have made, but narrowed down his options until he chose one.

4. Expect the best but prepare for the worse. Especially when there’s a human element involved, we have to come to grips with reality.  Even after proper evaluation, things still might go wrong.   So learn to expect the unexpected.
5. Take responsibility for the outcome. Leaders should be quick to attribute successful decisions to others, but just as quickly, they should take the blame for the bad ones.  The bottom line is that you could have said or done something else to get a different result.  Accepting responsibility is the first step towards making a better decision next time.

Mankind has been making decisions since the Garden of Eden.  Nevertheless, decision-making is still not an easy task, especially when the heat is on.  We should endeavor to get better at this daily process.  After all, even the smallest decision can change the course of our lives forever.

Leave a comment:  What tip, strategy or system has helped you to become better at making the decisive calls even under pressure?

Image courtesy of Rula Sibai at Unsplash.com

Gail Sheehy said it best when she noted that, “If we don’t change, we don’t grow.  If we don’t grow, we aren’t really living.”  What a pointed and truthful statement!  Growth requires change and we can’t really change unless we grow in the process.  Sounds like a classic scenario of “Which comes first, the chicken or the egg?”

Dr. Myles Munroe asserts that there are three constants:  death, taxes and CHANGE!  In his book, The Principles and Benefits of Change, he explains that there are four types of changes:

1. Change that happens around us,
2. Change that happens to us,
3. Change that happens in us, and
4. Change that we make

How can we make positive change happen in 2015?  Jim Rohn, my virtual mentor, said that there are two catalysts for change: inspiration or desperation.  Whether we desire to make change happen in our instructional practices, in our classroom management or even in our leadership skills, we must choose to be motivated by inspiration.  Doing so will enable us to proactively pursue our purpose despite the odds.

We must first accept the fact that our circumstances were created by our choices.  Therefore, as we leave the harbor to push out into the deep of a brand new year, perhaps we can find wisdom in how some educators look back at the effects of their choices in order to embrace change each year.

Dr. Stacy Stubbs, former National Teacher of the Year of the Bahamas and founder of the Nassau School explains that she reviews all of the goals not accomplished that year.  “I devise a plan as to how to make them come into fruition the next year at an even faster rate.”

Sounds too simple?  Well, Lee Ann Forbes, a Writing Specialist and a successful classroom teacher in the Bahamas’ Department of Education concurs. She notes that she would “Think back and project forward” by asking herself, “Was the task fully or partially accomplished?”  From this point, she knows which goals must be revisited and revamped.

If you’re still not convinced, check out what Joan Knowles-Turnquest, another former National Teacher of the Year from the Bahamas says.  “I use reflective practice.  This allows me to reflect on what I did wrong and what worked.  It allows me to set the agenda for the new term and to engage in a process of continuous learning”.  Good stuff, huh?

Here are three important actions we can take away from what these educators have shared in order to become intentional about change:

• Reflect – Recall the steps you took, activities in which you engaged and the decisions you made. If you’ve kept a diary, this would be a good time to check it out to pry your memory.
• Review – Assess the impact of what happened. Ask yourself, “What worked well for me?  Why?  What must I do differently?”
• Revamp –Make adjustments where necessary. After all, if we keep doing what we have always done, we will keep getting what we’ve always gotten.  So, we must intentionally plan.

Putting these activities of reflecting, reviewing and revamping high on your agenda gets you on track for embracing change.   If you are serious about personal excellence, if you truly value growth and progress and if you know beyond a shadow of a doubt that you were meant to do more and to be more, then join me this year on a quest to be an active part of change rather than its victim.

Avoid living a year of regret by simply embracing change.  Change will come; why not make it work in your favor?

Leave a comment:  What change do you plan to “make happen” this year?